You can't escape change
Whenever something comes along and drastically changes your life it's painful, I don't know if it's the change itself, or the fear of everything unknown, but it always hurts, in one way or another. We all go through these stages, some are the changes that comes naturally with age and maturity, like leaving home, and making choices for your future life, some are more individual and different, like what choices you do make for your future life. And there's the choices others make for you, that changes your life just the same. There's the first love you experience, and the end of it, the first time someone close to you dies, the first time you get a job, and the first time you lose one. All these moments changes your life, as well as how you percive yourself, and therebye who you are.
Even the most normal life will push you around and bruise you at times. And most of us don't lead "normal" lives, most of us are bound to take a serious beating by life at times, and carry the scars around with us forever. There's the scars you get as a kid, both the ones at your knees and the ones on your hart and soul, maybe you were bullied, maybe your parents wasn't great with kids, or maybe you didn't have anyone at all. Maybe you were lonely and scared, or bad things happened. Time fixes lot's of things, or at least makes them hurt a lot less, but somewhere inside you're still that kid that ate your lunch alone and just wished to be invisible. Fortunately, when you're a kid you still have that assurence that it will get easier, that belief dosen't really fade untill you're at least in your twenties, then you realize nobody's got it all together, that faith truly is blind, and that bad things can happen to anyone, at anytime. And you get burned by love, betrayed by friends and sometimes, it seems, really screwed over by life itself, and you grow to realize that beeing alive can a very painful thing, for everyone.
But thankfully there's more to it, thankfully there's the other side of things, the good one. There's love for once, thats's a big one, in all it's forms, friends, family, lovers, and all the other ones that sticks around for a while, or for a lifetime. Some might leave, some you might lose, but what you had is no less valuable, even when it hurts the most. Because one day, with a little luck, you will be able to look back with fondness, on the memories you made, and in the end that's all we've got. There's the adventure of doing something new for the first time, of seeing someplace you've never been before, meeting people and learning new skills, exploring the world and everything in it. It's the sunrise that's just perfect, it's that last night out with a friend that's leaving town, when you're sad and happy at the same time, and all the things that you'll remember, always. That's some of the things that makes life so very much worth living, and now I'm not even including all the tiny blessings that everyday life can be filled with if you only pause and take time to notice them.
The fact that life is always changing is both a blessing and a curse, when you are truly happy it's often hard to forget that it will not last forever, when you are brokenharted it's often hard to remember that it will not last forever. You can't predict life, how hard you might try, there's just no safe cards to play, you can't run and you can't hide. So why not stop trying?
I decided long ago to stop letting fear of change control me, granted, I'm not always that successful at it, but all one really needs to do is try. And of course I'm still just as scared as anyone, in fact I'm often horrified. Of beeing hurt yet again, of all that's unfamiliar, of failing and not beeing good enough. My private demons are still screaming in the back of my head at times(metaphorically speaking that is), I am still very much afraid, but I have stopped listening to that particular part of myself, because hiding dosen't help at all. The world will always find you, and the price you pay, for protection through solitude, is a high one when things take a bad turn. So try to face your fears, and venture out into the world, I can promise you pain, but I can promise you happiness as well. Remember that there are no constant things in life(besides death, taxes and a few mathematical formulas), happiness comes as an uneven string of moments and events, cherish your days, don't forget that you never know how many of them you have left until they run out. When your nuber is up, what are you most likely to regret, things you did, or everything you let fear keep you from doing?
It's your life, only you can live it.
Yes, I'm having a strange evening, I'll be back in to my more witty and lightharted self in a couple of days I assume, until then I suggest you listen, for a while, to Tom McRae's "For the restless", and do something that makes you feel good. I'm gonna go to bed, read a bit of Douglas Coupland, and then hopefully sleep for a while.
Miramuffin says Goodnight and good luck.
Even the most normal life will push you around and bruise you at times. And most of us don't lead "normal" lives, most of us are bound to take a serious beating by life at times, and carry the scars around with us forever. There's the scars you get as a kid, both the ones at your knees and the ones on your hart and soul, maybe you were bullied, maybe your parents wasn't great with kids, or maybe you didn't have anyone at all. Maybe you were lonely and scared, or bad things happened. Time fixes lot's of things, or at least makes them hurt a lot less, but somewhere inside you're still that kid that ate your lunch alone and just wished to be invisible. Fortunately, when you're a kid you still have that assurence that it will get easier, that belief dosen't really fade untill you're at least in your twenties, then you realize nobody's got it all together, that faith truly is blind, and that bad things can happen to anyone, at anytime. And you get burned by love, betrayed by friends and sometimes, it seems, really screwed over by life itself, and you grow to realize that beeing alive can a very painful thing, for everyone.
But thankfully there's more to it, thankfully there's the other side of things, the good one. There's love for once, thats's a big one, in all it's forms, friends, family, lovers, and all the other ones that sticks around for a while, or for a lifetime. Some might leave, some you might lose, but what you had is no less valuable, even when it hurts the most. Because one day, with a little luck, you will be able to look back with fondness, on the memories you made, and in the end that's all we've got. There's the adventure of doing something new for the first time, of seeing someplace you've never been before, meeting people and learning new skills, exploring the world and everything in it. It's the sunrise that's just perfect, it's that last night out with a friend that's leaving town, when you're sad and happy at the same time, and all the things that you'll remember, always. That's some of the things that makes life so very much worth living, and now I'm not even including all the tiny blessings that everyday life can be filled with if you only pause and take time to notice them.
The fact that life is always changing is both a blessing and a curse, when you are truly happy it's often hard to forget that it will not last forever, when you are brokenharted it's often hard to remember that it will not last forever. You can't predict life, how hard you might try, there's just no safe cards to play, you can't run and you can't hide. So why not stop trying?
I decided long ago to stop letting fear of change control me, granted, I'm not always that successful at it, but all one really needs to do is try. And of course I'm still just as scared as anyone, in fact I'm often horrified. Of beeing hurt yet again, of all that's unfamiliar, of failing and not beeing good enough. My private demons are still screaming in the back of my head at times(metaphorically speaking that is), I am still very much afraid, but I have stopped listening to that particular part of myself, because hiding dosen't help at all. The world will always find you, and the price you pay, for protection through solitude, is a high one when things take a bad turn. So try to face your fears, and venture out into the world, I can promise you pain, but I can promise you happiness as well. Remember that there are no constant things in life(besides death, taxes and a few mathematical formulas), happiness comes as an uneven string of moments and events, cherish your days, don't forget that you never know how many of them you have left until they run out. When your nuber is up, what are you most likely to regret, things you did, or everything you let fear keep you from doing?
It's your life, only you can live it.
Yes, I'm having a strange evening, I'll be back in to my more witty and lightharted self in a couple of days I assume, until then I suggest you listen, for a while, to Tom McRae's "For the restless", and do something that makes you feel good. I'm gonna go to bed, read a bit of Douglas Coupland, and then hopefully sleep for a while.
Miramuffin says Goodnight and good luck.
posted by Miramuffin at 10:20 PM
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