From the diary, and ponderings over ambition
So, it's monday again, they always seem to sneek up on me nowadays, my weekends have gotten shorter somehow. This morning I woke up feeling melancolic, and the feeling never really subsided. Guess it's the christmas spirit. The power was out, and the silence, the void usually filled by electronic humming, was enough to make me wake startled, hart pounding and with a feeling that something was wrong with the world. That strange feeling when you know something is missing, but you can't seem to get a grasp of what's not there, not a great feeling to start ones day. Then I did some stumbeling around in the dark(it's dark nearly all day now, strange living north of everything), realized I would have no coffee to start my day, and escaped to the city, where the lights were working(and the grizly match made in hell between marketing and christmas has made the city sparkle with a combitation of lights and agressive advertisement) and the coffee was hidious but blessedly warm and caffeinfilled. Just another ordinary day, so much like any other that it scares me a little. Been mailing a friend of mine, just the mundane everyday stuff and some recommendations on reading material, still it is nice to know I'm not the only one feeling a little disconnected in theese times, and it's cosy talking about movies and why sunday is not the day for deep and painful dramaoriented films.
Nice things for conversation.
I have been thinking a bit on the concept of ambition, and the possible lack of them lately. So many of us are just going through the motions, we know what we like to do, but we know the odds are stacked against us, so we make some choices. Some opts for a career, not out of want, but because we are suposed to want it, something with a resonable to decent pay and good chances of employment, something we can live with, and try to bury the dreams we had by deeming them to have been born by youth and naivety rather than some drive to reach our potential in a difficult and ungreatful field. Some opt to go for the dream, the one shot possibility, the all your eggs in a fragile, poorly made basket way to go. And some of them make it, some of them even make it big, neccessity and desperation can be a good motivation on it's own. But for most of the driven crowd, most of us with difficult dreams, dreams without a fasttrack to a solid paycheck, we end up inbetween things. We work, because we have to live, in mundane dayjobs, jobs that never pay very well, jobs we in time might come to hate, hoping for, and hopefully, working towards, our maybe far fetched dreams, kept up at night by the fear that we might never make it, the fear that we might have to stick with our marginally interesting jobs forever. And we envy the others. The majority, the kids whom grew up and went for the money, never looking back, we know our dreams have always been diffrent, and we sometimes curse ourselves for it.
So this is for all of you out there, the struggeling writers, the unemployed actors, the artist failing to be understood or appreciated, the musicians once again faced with the question of "when they are going to get a real job?", this is for everyone who took a look at conventional life, career, stationwagon, house in constant remodeling, a labrador barking in the backyard and said "Is that all there is? I think I'll go find something else."
Grab a hold of your dream, find a way towards it, take the job that gets you by on the way to bigger better things, maybe you'll make it, maybe you won't. But you will at least know that you tried, bechause ambition is no one thing. It's not what the people at the office are trying to make you belive, it's not getting a parking space with your name on it where you work, it's not the dream of having a slightly more expencive car than your next door neighbour. Ambition is simply put what you wan't to do with your life, what you want, where you want to be.
Ambition is realizing the choice is yours.
Miramuffins says: Feeling better now. Have a great day out in the strange and befuddling world we live in, have fun, learn new things and don't let anyone take you for granted. Speak your minds and don't let your curiosity die, questioning can get you anywhere, and thanks to the blessed web knowledge is now a mere keystroke away. Have fun, go wild, be kind, and live your life, that's what it's for.
Nice things for conversation.
I have been thinking a bit on the concept of ambition, and the possible lack of them lately. So many of us are just going through the motions, we know what we like to do, but we know the odds are stacked against us, so we make some choices. Some opts for a career, not out of want, but because we are suposed to want it, something with a resonable to decent pay and good chances of employment, something we can live with, and try to bury the dreams we had by deeming them to have been born by youth and naivety rather than some drive to reach our potential in a difficult and ungreatful field. Some opt to go for the dream, the one shot possibility, the all your eggs in a fragile, poorly made basket way to go. And some of them make it, some of them even make it big, neccessity and desperation can be a good motivation on it's own. But for most of the driven crowd, most of us with difficult dreams, dreams without a fasttrack to a solid paycheck, we end up inbetween things. We work, because we have to live, in mundane dayjobs, jobs that never pay very well, jobs we in time might come to hate, hoping for, and hopefully, working towards, our maybe far fetched dreams, kept up at night by the fear that we might never make it, the fear that we might have to stick with our marginally interesting jobs forever. And we envy the others. The majority, the kids whom grew up and went for the money, never looking back, we know our dreams have always been diffrent, and we sometimes curse ourselves for it.
So this is for all of you out there, the struggeling writers, the unemployed actors, the artist failing to be understood or appreciated, the musicians once again faced with the question of "when they are going to get a real job?", this is for everyone who took a look at conventional life, career, stationwagon, house in constant remodeling, a labrador barking in the backyard and said "Is that all there is? I think I'll go find something else."
Grab a hold of your dream, find a way towards it, take the job that gets you by on the way to bigger better things, maybe you'll make it, maybe you won't. But you will at least know that you tried, bechause ambition is no one thing. It's not what the people at the office are trying to make you belive, it's not getting a parking space with your name on it where you work, it's not the dream of having a slightly more expencive car than your next door neighbour. Ambition is simply put what you wan't to do with your life, what you want, where you want to be.
Ambition is realizing the choice is yours.
Miramuffins says: Feeling better now. Have a great day out in the strange and befuddling world we live in, have fun, learn new things and don't let anyone take you for granted. Speak your minds and don't let your curiosity die, questioning can get you anywhere, and thanks to the blessed web knowledge is now a mere keystroke away. Have fun, go wild, be kind, and live your life, that's what it's for.
posted by Miramuffin at 1:22 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home